The Quest For Pharoah's Gold
by the Librarians
Summary: When pirates attack Port Royal, Will and Elizabeth are ordered to find Jack, but the journey could prove far more difficult when they finally locate the infamous pirate captain, who as always, has an agenda of his own. JE, possible WOC.
1. Chapter 1

It was an average and normal day in Port Royal. Liz was passing the time watching Will work in the smithy. Will had to finish the day's work before he could treat Lizzie to the romantic dinner of bread and lamb, purchased with his last five shillings, that he'd been preparing for the two of them unbeknownst to Miss Swann.

She sat and observed him as he hammered away at a sword while shirtless. His muscles glistened because it was hot in the smithy. The pair suddenly heard cannon fire from the bay.

"I know those cannons!" hollered Will.

He rushed outside to see what was going on. It turned out he didn't know those cannons because some strange pirates who'd never been seen before were attacking Port Royal.

"O Snap! We're under fire!" cried a distraught Liz, grabbing Will's arm, handing him a sword she'd brought from inside.

Fearing for Lizzie's life, he suggested they should try to avoid the pirates. He kissed her. "Miss Swann, I suggest we try to avoid these pirates," he told his love, hoping the lamb for supper would survive the battle.

They tried to avoid the unfamiliar pirates but they were soon captured. The captain of the ship and leader of the unfamiliar pirates, a large, scary dude, informed the pair that they, along with the people of Port Royale, would be killed if Will and Lizzy didn't bring him Jack Sparrow.

"I wants that there Jack Sparra' ter be brung ter me by yuns, Will Turner and Liz Swann, or else we'z gonna kill everyone in Port Royal and ye two too." Then he added, "And also, we shall burn this town as well when we are finished slaughtering everyone."

"We will find Jack and bring him back, I swear it!"

And so, Governor Swann chartered them a boat to help them search for Jack so they could bring him back and the people wouldn't be kilt and the town wouldn't be burnt to the floor.

First, they rode the boat to Tortuga, but the Pearl wasn't there, and neither was Jack and nobody knew where to find him either.

Will was like, "Where ever shall we look now, for Port Royal hangs in the balance."

Suddenly, Liz remembered that she remembered the way to the Isla de Muerta, so they drove the ship, Ruby Red, to the island of death and found all the treasure gone and Jack and the Pearl weren't there either.

So they left the Isla de Muerta, and the boat needed supplies so they went to the nearest port, Port Au Prince. Parking the ship, they saw the Pearl, and Will and Lizzie went aboard.

They asked where Jack was, but nobody knew.

Gibbs said, "We ain't seen Jack for nigh on 10 days since we got here."

So will and Lizzie went into the town to look for Jack, and Will thought maybe they should search the whorehouses, but he didn't want Miss Swann to be subjected to them.

"Avast, Miss Swann! I shall search for Jack in the Ladies' of the Evenings houses," he could not bring himself to call the whorehouses by their proper name, "but it is not proper for you to enter such places so you mustn't come with me. I will go alone," he proclaimed bravely, chocolatey locks falling into his face, making him look boyish.

"Okay," agreed Liz and as Will went off to search for Jack in the whorehouses, she began to wander through the streets just looking around when suddenly, she tripped over something on the sidewalk.

It was Jack Sparrow's body.

His soul was in it to it too, and he was passed out drunk but her tripping woke him and he was all like, "Lizzy? Where's the rum, luv, savvy?"

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A/N: That's the first chapter. We hope you enjoy it as much as we do. Reviewers get their own boat. 


	2. Chapter 2

Liz stood there looking at Jack as he stood. "Where have you been? The crew hasn't seen you in 10 days."

Jack grinned. "Drunk, me darlin' girl! How drunk, you might ask? Well, let me tell you, I— Lizzie, is that you? Am I dreaming? How did you get here?"

"Jack! We must find Will! He's looking for you in the whorehouses."

Jack blinked; he really was quite drunk at the moment. "Come again, luv."

Lizzie stepped into his face. "I SAID, MY HAWT BOYFRIEND'S LOOKING FOR YOU IN THE WHOREHOUSES OF THE TOWN!"

"Oh, well no need to shoot, luv, savvy?"

Grabbing the lapels of his jacket, she shook him. "We have to find Will!"

"OK, luv, okay. Don't get your under things in a knot. We'll find your dear William, then take ourselves to the Pearl, aye?" he took a swig of rum. "Let's be off, shall we? I happen to be quite familiar with the brothels in this town."

Jack and Liz went to a ladies of the evening house and they looked around.

Elisabeth though to herself, 'Oh my, all the naked bodies. How terribly improper!'

'Yet lewdly intriguing at the same time, wouldn't you agree?' replied her inner self.

'Why yes...I mean, certainly not! A lady like me shouldn't be in a place like this.'

'Not in those clothes, no.'

Liz looked down to her brown pants, white pirate shirt complete with black undershirt, grey vest and purple sash. "What's wrong with my clothes?"

Jack raised an eyebrow. "The fact you're wearing clothes in a whorehouse is a surprising feat, if you're asking me, luv."

Liz was about to reply, denouncing Jack's comment and pronouncing its impropriety or perhaps making a lewd one of her own when a strange old woman walked into the room.

"Son!" cried she, and she threw her arms around Jack. "You've come to visit! Can I get you a girl for the night?"

"No, Ma...maybe later. I've come looking for my super cool swashbuckling hottie friend Will Turner. He's about yea tall" he motioned around his chest area, "with swords, morals. You'd know him: eunuch. Not much for one of your girls to due with 'im, savvy?"

"Well I ain't seen him." She turned to Lizzy. "An' what you be doin' here, luv? Lookin' fer a job...or are you already on patrol as it were?"

Miss Swann's eyes went wide. Jack pushed her behind him. "You know, Ma, not every woman I hang with is a whore."

Jack's mom raised an eyebrow.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Never mind, Ma. We're going now." They embraced again. And Lizzie thought she heard Jack whisper "Luv ye," before leaving.

Walking out of the whorehouse, they went into another.

Meanwhile, Will went into a yet another whorehouse, for Port Au Prince was quite littered with them, and he was flabbergasted by all the nakedness and couldn't believe what he saw, and he was glad Mrs. Swann hadn't come.

"I'm glad Miss Swann didn't come," he said and shouted aloud for Jack. Jack didn't answer back.

So he asked some women where Jack was, but they didn't know, and he decided to leave. But as he was leaving a woman came up to him and prepositioned him for the night. Will refused, explaining that he was in love with Miss Swann, but the hooker got mad and knocked him over the head with a handy bottle of rum.

Meanwhile, Jack and Elizabeth had no luck finding Will at the next whorehouse, so they were about to leave when suddenly they heard cannon fire from the harbor.

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A/N: Chapter two is done; yay! So please review and receive a Victor's Secret catalog for your trouble! 


	3. Chapter 3

Jack and Lizzie ran down to the docks where the boats were. They didn't see the Pearl and Jack was all like, "Where's me Pearl?"

And Liz remarked, "The boat. It's gone, savvy?"

"Admirably astute, luv."

Suddenly Lizzie recognized the vessel that was doing the attacking, and she told Jack what had happened at Port Royale and how she and Will had get Jack or the town would be burnt to a crisp with her daddy there and all the people of Port Royal and all her stuff cause she really cared about her stuff and didn't want her teddy bear to be burned with everybody and the town, and she missed her room because she had a bed with lots of pillows and quits and good things and particularly marmalade, which she missed a whole lot and wanted to eat some right then because that would make her happy as would a lot of other things, like getting her mack on with a certain pirate, but she couldn't do that because it would be improper, and she wanted to take a swim in the harbor of Port Royal because there was a nice little bay that she got to missing when she could not swim in it, and she thought she might try out some pirate language because she was sort of a pirate anyway, and she thought Will was a pirate because she said so that day on the battlement when she kissed him in front of her daddy and god and everyone and some people who she didn't know and maybe the crew of the Pearl if they were looking at her through a spy glass because Gibbs sort of had some fetishes as she remembered, and she wouldn't be surprised if that happened because it could, and she didn't want her daddy to die with her teddy bear and Port Royal, and that wouldn't be cool because—

At this point, Jack grabbed her shoulders and shook. "LIZZY! You and Will betrayed me! You've set me up, haven't you!"

Liz blinked. "What? Jack, we haven't set you up at all. We need you to come back or everyone in Port Royal will die! Don't you understand?"

"What I understand is that I've been betrain, luv! You've betrain me!"

"But Jack, I wouldn't betray you!" And saying such, she started crying because she was upset that Jack thought she had betrayed him.

"I don't believe you!" He went to the horse that was standing conveniently nearby and leapt onto it and started galloping away.

So Lizzie jumped on that other horse and called in her shrill Elizabeth-Swann-Governor's-daughter voice, "You get back here, Jack Sparrow!"

And Jack yelled back in his usual humorously romanticized piratical fashion, "Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"

But she chased him because she didn't like to take orders, particularly not from a blackguard like Jack Sparrow.

Meanwhile, Will woke up from his knock on the head and decided to leave the ladies of the evening house. As he stepped outside, he heard cannon fire.

"I know those cannons!" he shouted, and this time he did know those canons because the same pirates who attacked Port Royal and wanted Jack Sparrow in chapter one are the ones who are attacking Port Au Prince now. Will took his knife and charged at the pirates, wanting to cut them as to prevent anything from happening to Miss Swann, who he thought was lollygagging about somewhere in the port but was really chasing Jack on a horse.

A/N: Chapter 3 is complete and even remastered. Take a few seconds of your valuable time to review us and get a root beer flavored dumdum.


	4. Chapter 4

Jack rode the horse until he reached another boat farther down. It was a big boat: a little ship, if you will. Someone who knew something about ships might call it a sloop.

Liz rode up behind him and de-horsed.

Jack, deciding it would be more beneficial to him if he let Elizabeth help him ready the boat to sail, hopped off his own steed. "Come on, luv, we're gonna take that ship." He could just throw her overboard later if she got to be too much of a hassle, and he was pretty sure she would.

"We're going to steal the boat?" asked a curious and unsure Liz. She was somewhat dazed from the horse ride; horses didn't agree with her ladylike constitution.

"Commandeer, luv. Nautical term." Then he muttered under his breath, "Didn't Will teach you anything?"

And so, they boarded the boat and made it ready to sail.

Meanwhile, Will was fighting off the attacking pirates who had originally attacked Port Royal but were now attacking Port Au Prince. While engaged with one particularly menacing dude with stinky breath, he asked, "What are you doing here?"

The random pirate replied, in a forebodingly dark voice, "Don't worry; we're leaving pretty soon."

And sure enough, the pirates left pretty soon.

Meanwhile, on the _Black Pearl_, the crew was confused. No one knew what was going on.

"Where the bloody Hell are we, savvy? Why aren't we at the docks?" wondered Gibbs. He began to pace as the other crewmembers, not having an answer to the question, looked on in astonishment.

Meanwhile, Jack and Liz began to drive the ship away from Port Au Prince.

"Wait, Jack! We can't leave Will. We must go back for him at once!"

"No time for that, luv. We have to find me _Pearl_."

And with that, he waved Port Au Prince a goodbye with his had, "Good-bye, Port Au Prince," hoping his next visit would include at least 11 days of uninterrupted drunken peace. In the meantime, he needed to find his ship.

Meanwhile back in Port Au Prince, Will Turner got to the docks just in time to see Jack and Lizzie leaving, and no amount of waving his arms would get them to turn back "Ahh shucks," said Will.

So, he figured since he was abandoned in Port Au Prince, he might as well go to the pubs and try to find a pirate ship to hitch a ride with. He ended up in a karaoke bar, where he proceeded to drink away his sorrows.

Meanwhile, back at the _Pearl_, Gibbs, in a flash of possibly (but not very likely so) divine inspiration, ordered the crew to begin sailing back the way they came.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch...err, sloop that Jack and Lizzy had commandeered, "Where are we going?" asked Liz, who was angry but figured it wasn't a good time to jump off the ship and swim back for Will because it would totally mess up her hair.

"Why. where ever the wind takes us, luv, savvy?"

And so, they sailed with the wind, in the general direction of...well, that's not important.

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A/N: Well here's chapter 4. Do excuse the long time between updates. We'll work harder in the future. Review and receive a dried out purple marker.

**Shout Out:** The Librarians would like to thank Mistress Zky for reviewing and giving us some writing advice. You can currently find Mistress Zky sailing about happily on her boat, _Ragazza Nuda,_ sucking on her dumdum while flipping through her Victor's Secret catalog.


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